Hello everyone! Looks like I’m gonna be doing another update regarding not only my compilations, but my online activity. If you haven’t seen my Twitter thread sharing my story for Autism Acceptance Month, I suggest you do so. It’ll clear some things up and give more context about my experience. If you already have, thank you.
So far, I’ve been gathering clips for future compilations and ones I’m working on updating and it’s been doing fairly well and I’m trying to get back into things day by day when it comes to my compilations. I am STILL planning on doing my compilations for NW Arkansas, Youngstown, and Salisbury, along with other compilations I plan on updating and I have some ideas I have for my channel. Unfortunately, compiling and gathering clips is very time-consuming and I feel like it’s time-consuming at the expense of other important stuff I should really focus on.
As most of you know, I’m a freshman college student. On top of my compilations, I also have a lot of homework and assignments to do, especially with what’s going on right now in the world. To be honest, I really haven’t been paying attention to my academic needs lately and I’ve pretty much had that spring break mentality I’ve had on my mind for two weeks. It’s putting a burden in my academic work, especially when I’m not used to having to do all my classes online. Sure, it’s a bit convenient but I’m a very easily distracted flamingo when it comes to stuff I have to do online, so it’s hard for me to focus on what’s important.
I really haven’t had all my classes online before in my entire life, and I assume most people haven’t. I really like the sense of having that college experience by going to campus every single day. This is something most people will be having a struggle getting used to, and this is especially the case for people like me who are autistic. For me, I tend to go along with a set routine every day and whenever there’s a disturbance to my routine I get so much anxiety, I become a very easily distracted bird and focus away from the things that are super important. It’s not fun at all. It’s something that would come back to bite me in the butt every single time it has happened. In times like these, I’m honestly trying my best to adjust to this new normal, which I hope is temporary. It’s difficult as heck, but I hope that I will get through this, and I will.
I haven’t been feeling the best for a while now mentally and I know that there’s something wrong with me, but I haven’t done anything about it, at least, not until today. As someone who wants to help people smile, I feel like what’s more important is that I help myself smile, slowly but surely. In a sense, I kinda feel like what Adler the Eagle has been through recently in terms of mental health. I want to stop this self-destructive loop as much as possible and find ways to keep myself organized.
I really haven’t done anything like this ever, mostly because I had this absurd mentality that overworking yourself is how you become successful and that rushing through things is the only way to keep up with others. This is something I need to get my mind off of, because it isn’t healthy for me, especially considering I’m someone who works at a slower and precise pace. I really enjoy making news open compilations and being a part of the communities I’m currently in, and I still do, but right now, I have bigger things to focus on, plus I kinda feel burned out. This is why I’m announcing that I’ll be taking a social media break, which I expect to last around two to three weeks. This means that I won’t be active or at least not as active on all social media platforms I am in, which includes Twitter, Discord, and Fandom. Instagram is somewhat included, but I’ll only be using it so I can connect with friends I know in college.
I’ll only be on Twitter to give important updates or in the event I might have to do emergency commissions, which I really hope doesn’t come to that, because I don’t feel like I’m ready to do commissions at all. As for Discord and Fandom, I won’t be on my main account and will be using another account on my wiki server. Keep in mind, I will only use this account IF and ONLY IF I need to deal with situations where I need to punish someone with a mute or ban and nobody else is available. Other than that, I can’t do anything else such as deleting images from the wiki (unless they’re inappropriate in which case, I will). I’m deeply sorry, but I gotta prioritize on my college assignments as well as my mental health.
I hope you all understand why I made this decision and that it’s for my own well-being. I will be back once I get my stuff together academically and I hope I can have a better and more stable routine when I complete my assignments.
As for things for me to take a short mental break on from my college work, I might be doing something like playing a video game, doing some short exercise, or cutting clips for my future news open compilations. This means progress is still going to be made on my compilations, but now I’m gonna be working on them day by day at my own pace, because compilation-making shouldn’t be a race and I think people should know that.
If there’s anything I want to end this off with, it’s that I know that this is something a lot of people like me are going through right now and that most of us are going through some tough times in one way or another. I know people are also having a hard time adjusting to the new changes in their lives and how their routines have been disrupted due to what’s been going on in the world right now. I know, and it sucks, but rest assured, I have faith there will be good news on the way very soon. We will get through this together. We just gotta take it one step at a time.
P.S. To the one person also doing news open compilations on YouTube currently (Robert Lee), if you can give me a place where I can reach out to you outside of YouTube or contact me through email, that would be very much appreciated. The last thing I want is for someone else, whether it’d be you or someone else to make a compilation of a station I plan on doing because I’m working hard to get back into making compilations, especially from the three markets I plan on doing (Youngstown, Salisbury, & NW Arkansas) and the stations I plan on updating, but I need to take a breather because of other things I have going on in my life.
If I need to, I will try and work something out with you and K.H., who I can talk to on DMs in the TVNT forums. However, please do not rip any of my compilations that I have done or will be updating or this flamingo won’t be very happy. I really don’t like making statements like this, but because you don’t have any other place where I can reach to you, I feel like I don’t have a choice.